New year. Same me.
Growth? I don't even know her... but there are writer tips in here.
Happy New Year… almost two weeks late!!!
I know people love the new year and the fresh start and blah blah blah, but it stresses me TF out. I run pretty anxious during every calendar month, but something about the start of the year and its vast possibilities brings out the absolute worst in me.
With this is mind, it should come as no surprise that 2024 has started off with a very chaotic bang. First, I threw my back out because nothing screams “new year, new you” like a debilitating injury from bending over wrong! Plus side, I did order a new heating pad and NOTHING has brought me more joy. It’s the best $17 I’ve ever spent and I now end my days with tea, a book, and heating pad, just like every elder millennial should.
As if that wasn’t glamorous enough, the flu entered the chat next. Thankfully we were able to keep it contained, but it hit Ellis hard. She would break out in hives each night and her fever would skyrocket. The first night, she had hives on her ears and when I took her fever with the ear thermometer, it registered at 105.3. I ALMOST PASSED OUT! Of course, as a person with anxiety does, I am well stocked on thermometers. After that truly unhinged temp came back, I pulled out the an oral thermometer which read at a high, but reasonable, 102.6. The flu lasted about a week, but I’m happy to report we’re all doing well now and it did result in the wildest doctor appointment I’ve ever had, but I’ll save that for another day. This is a weekly newsletter, I can’t give you everything at once!
All and all, a very rude start to the year.
Zero stars.
Besides a bone-crushing amount of anxiety, the new year also comes with a fair amount of nostalgia. There’s the sweet NYE I spent binging The Godfather trilogy with my grandparents when I was 12. On NYE 2006, someone spiked my drink and I ended blacking out in the Taco Bell on the 16th Street Mall.
*Insert picture here*
Thanks for keeping the memories alive, facebook.
But New Year’s Eve 2016 in Laramie, Wyoming was the one that changed my life. I’ve never been big on resolutions, but for some reason, that year I had one that I knew I had to make. I was going to give writing a chance.
Leading up to 2016, I’d been working on my manuscript for almost 4 years. Besides my husband, a few of my closest friends, and a mom friend, nobody knew I was writing. I treated it like a shameful secret. I would start writing and then stop again. I’d delete everything and then avoid opening my computer for weeks. But that was 2015 Alexa. 2016 Alexa was finally going to write those two magical words “the end” and see if publishing was something that could be in the cards.
Plus, because when I first started writing, I never thought I’d even let anyone read what I wrote, just trying was a win! I had zero expectation of what the year would bring so I wouldn’t be disappointed no matter what. I never could’ve dreamt that by the end of the year, I’d have a writing community, a completely new manuscript, and an agent.
I don’t know if this sounds familiar to anyone reading, but if it does and you’re ready to push yourself this year, I have some tips/tricks/unsolicited advice to share from my year of trying.
Find Your Community
The biggest changing point for me was when I found my critique partner (CP). I met my CP in the facebook mom group we were both in. She had posted that she had dreams of being a YA author and I slipped into her DMs telling her I also had secret dreams of being a romance author. Neither of us had let anybody read our stories before, but we decided to start swapping 1-2 chapters of our manuscripts each week. Not only did it keep us accountable, but we finally had a cheerleader. We would tell each other what we loved about the stories and if there were things we didn’t understand. It was very gentle and overwhelmingly positive. More than critique, we offered encouragement and it gave me the confidence to not only finish my manuscript, but allow others to read it as well.
Maybe you don’t have a facebook group to find your CP, but if you’re just starting to write, send a chapter to a trusted friend. Be sure this is someone who will be kind and caring with their thoughts. If you already have this and are ready to start reaching out to other authors, there are little corners all over the internet to find writer circles. #FridayKiss, FridayKiss on Facebook, is a great place for romance writers. Depending on where you live, there might be writers groups nearby like The Porch in Nashville and Lighthouse Writers in Denver. I haven’t used this resource, but I have heard qtCritique is a great resource as well.
Choose Your Publishing Journey
There are so many options out there for authors now and before you can even start, you’re really going to need to decide if you’re interested in traditional or self-publishing. One is not better than the other, but one might be better for you. No matter what, please keep in mind that you can change your mind! When I started looking into publishing, I was told if I self-published, I would never get a traditional deal. That is 100% not true anymore. The only reason I recommend choosing one is because there is a lot of information and learning for both might be overwhelming in the beginning.
If you want to go the traditional route, you’ll want to research agents, learn how to write a strong query letter, and get your submission package in tip-top shape. Query Shark was my favorite resource when I was learning how to write a query letter and Manuscript Wish List was my favorite website to learn about agents.
If self-publishing calls to you, there are a few Facebook groups that very openly share about self-publishing journeys like 20 Books to 50k. You might want to start looking into editors, cover designers, and formatting.
I’ve found that the writing community is very generous with their knowledge, so don’t be afraid to ask questions! It’s not only a great way to learn, but also to make new friends and get great book recommendations.
Be Your Own Editor
When I started writing in my basement, I can tell you with 100 percent certainty that I had no idea what the fuck I was doing. I didn’t know what the romance arc was, I’d never heard of a beat sheet, and I had no idea what an action tag was or how to organize my dialogue. I didn’t know genre guidelines or what my word count should be. I was an avid romance reader and I did my best to emulate the formulas I loved, but it was obvious fairly quickly that my manuscript was a hot mess.
These days I have a lot of resources that I love as a writer. If you’re looking for a craft book, Story Genius and The Emotional Craft of Fiction are my favorites. If podcasts are more of your jam, Turning to Story (hosted by my first CP Lyssa Mia Smith and Anna Mercier ) is a wealth of information; the episode on Seven Layer Plot Dip changed the way I approach plotting a story. As soon as I start a new project, I go to Jami Gold and download a new beat sheet.
Quick tip- if you’ve already written a manuscript and are looking for a quick way to make it better, look for filler words! Filler words are unnecessary words that take up space and clutter sentences. I always have to delete “just” and “that” when I write. Next time you open your manuscript, go to the “find” feature and type in “that” and see how many times it shows up in your document. Go through your manuscript and delete the unnecessary mentions.
Write
Screw the rules. Forget about querying and self-publishing. Take it all away. Sit down at your computer and start writing. If you write, you’re a writer. Simple as that. Remember that you have a story only you can tell and the only way that can happen is if you write it down. Don’t be precious about your words, you can always change them later, but you can’t edit an empty page.
No matter how you decide to publish (if that’s even a goal at all) I can’t stress how important it is to fall in love with the process. It is the one thing in this industry you can control. Love growing and learning. My goal this year is to create without expectation. I want to become a better writer and I want to love the stories I write. Thankfully, I have total control of both of those things.
And so do you.
Bookish Things
The e-book for Better than Fiction is on sale for $4.99! This is a great deal and the perfect bookish read to start the new year! Also, Next-Door Nemesis is NOT on sale, but it’s still very fun and very sexy and you should definitely check it out if you haven’t already. Please and thank you. 💖
Weekly Wrap-Up
Song I’m obsessing over
This might shock you, but I’m not picking a Taylor Song this week! Lately I’ve had Stuck On You by Giveon on repeat! All of his songs are amazing and his voice is so beautiful. When I listen to his songs, I just want to sit at my computer and write.
Must watch TV
The other night I turned on Fool Me Once on Netflix and the next thing I knew, it was 4 o’clock in the morning and the finale was ending. It was SO good and I’m going to watch it again with my husband.
What I’m reading
I mentioned it in my last newsletter, but when I'm overwhelmed, I like to re-read. I was reading the first book in the Sin Brothers series by Rebecca Zanetti and now I’m on book four, Total Surrender. Have I mentioned how much I love this series???? I’ve been switching between audio and my kindle versions and even though I’ve read them multiple times, I’m going to be so sad when I finish!
Podcast I can’t stop listening to
Newcomers with Nicole Buyer and Lauren Lapkus is back! This season they are watching all of the Batman movies. This show always makes me laugh so hard and I’m so happy there are new episodes! I’ll listen to any podcast with Nicole Buyer, but I think this might be my favorite!
Cocktail of the Week
Earl Grey Blackberry Bourbon Cocktail
Ingredients
1½ oz bourbon
1½ oz chilled Earl Grey Tea
½ oz shot simple syrup
1 blackberry
½ oz St. George Spiced Pear Liqueur (optional)
Garnish with a blackberry and a sprig of rosemary
Directions
Muddle blackberry with simple syrup.
Add bourbon, Earl Grey tea, Pear Liqueur if using and ice. Stir until very cold.
Strain through a fine mesh strainer into a coupe glass.
Garnish with a blackberry and a sprig of rosemary.
Enjoy!
Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed this and know someone else who will, remember that sharing is caring, so pass this along… please!